I’m not the kind of person who always says how busy I am. In fact, I’ve come to strongly dislike the phrase. I’ll say that I had a really busy day, or that I haven’t had time to do a given thing, but I never utter the words “I’ve been so super busy” to explain myself away.
I mean, it’s true, I’m busy. I have a kid and more than full time work. But most busyness is self-imposed.
Parenthood is another ball of wax. In fact, unless you’re a parent who takes care of your children the majority of your “free” time, you don’t understand the busyness that parenting involves.
But it’s probably less busyness, and more fatigue. Parenting, particularly for children under school age, is a whole lot of emotional energy spent. It’s not like you DO much when you spend all day with a young child. In fact, if you wrote it down on paper it would almost look like nothing at all. But it’s the fact that with particularly young kids you are ON ALL THE TIME and that they demand so much of your attention that leaves you spent at the end of the day.
I remember one person in my life saying that looking after a kid is easy. Okay. And I know there’s something to be said for stay-at-home parents who feel they have to justify their occupation as if it’s a contest. But now that I’m a parent OF ONLY ONE TODDLER I can fully understand parents stating how “busy” (tired) they are.
When you’re childless, your time is your own. Even if you have a lot filling your day, you’re filling it with activities that are your choice, and for your benefit.
I’m not going to throw in a caveat about how much I love being a mother and that I adore my girl; that’s a given. It’s just if I can make time for other people I certainly don’t want to hear how you can’t because you’re so busy.