Something happened today on my walk to the grocery store that is very typical. I was coming towards a group of kids who were maybe 13 or 14 years old with my daughter in her stroller. I did what I do every time I approach someone coming the opposite way on the sidewalk: I moved to the right, expecting they would also go to their right and we would pass each other in an efficient and practical manner. Sometimes, one person goes to the left, which is not what traffic customs dictate, but it’s okay because the intent is the same. Every once in a blue moon, however, you meet a different set of humans on the sidewalk who will do neither. These specimens are named kids.
I define kids as any person under an approximate age of 19, a group that can be further divided into children and teenagers. Kids are very insular human beings, having little concept of consequence or how their actions affect others. And in many circumstances they can be highly annoying by sheer virtue of their age. They think they’re funny when they’re not, they think they’re smart when they’re not, and they think they’re super cute when they’re super not.
Now, I love kids. I have nephews and nieces, I have a baby daughter and I want more. And I think all those kids are perfect and hilarious and thoughtful and bright and good looking.
Which is why THEY would never approach a woman pushing a stroller with a group of their teenaged friends and SPREAD THEMSELVES ACROSS THE ENTIRE SIDEWALK.
AND NOT MOVE.
FORCING ME TO GO OFF-ROADING INTO THE BUSHES.
Should I have just mowed them over? They’d survive. Plus, they’d learn a valuable lesson that would make society respect them so much more. I would be happy to do my part. For society.
A less drastic, and perhaps less effective approach, would be to just stand there and force them to walk around me. I should remember to do this next time.
I don’t mind when children do this because I understand they haven’t really learned how the world works. But adolescents have no excuse and I suspect they’re just being asses. Asses who can’t see past the end of their own noses. Which means it may be a myopic issue.
Clearly, a whole subset of our society needs glasses.